Today's TRAINING:
What Simplicity Offers
Why We Seek Complexity
Your Ego Rewards the Complicated
How to Simplify Your Life in 4
Steps
What Simplicity Offers
You actually can't find anyone who will tell you they have a problem with things being simple.
In fact, we vote with our dollars and we repeatedly pay more for products that advertise that it makes something "easier" or "simpler".
Our lives today are like gardens overgrown with weeds. Statistics tell us we hear 1,000 or more “ads” every day. There is always someone trying to sell
us something.
In addition to that, our jobs have grown complicated. Heck, even our family structures have grown complicated - where it used to just be mom dad and the kids.
Simplicity offers relief.
Simplicity offers security - because when things are simple you can know that you made the right choice. Not so long ago, if a stranger knocked on your door
you invited them inside made them comfortable and probably fed them a meal. That was considered simple and kind.
Simplicity offers clarity, which is power. Years ago, if a man pledged his love to you it meant he wanted to marry you, give you his name, his protection and lifelong financial support for you
and the children you would have. Three words told the woman ALL of that instantly. That was simple to understand and powerful.
Do not give into the myth that simplicity is no longer possible. It is been obscured but never destroyed.
Just look at the "tiny house movement". Huge push to simplify.
Why We Seek Complexity
I'll give you two guesses who really likes complexity?
My ego. And your ego.
One of the things I've discovered in the
process of coaching people from all over the world is that the ego operates the same in all people.
One of ego's favorite things is to seek, "long, slow complex struggle."
You allow your ego the most freedom to run your life and make your decisions when you are afraid. When you are surrounded with chaos, you vote emergency authority to your ego and curl up in a little ball and hide.
The ego has figured out that continuing chaos and difficulty in your life is its best bet for survival. To keep itself safe and it's power protected, it will encourage you to choose the complex over the simple, the long over the short and the struggle over the easy every time.
Love Does Not Seek Complexity, But Fear Does
It's one of the reasons that we kind of laugh when we see people in love, because they start looking at life as if it were “simple.” They start behaving as if there was less "clutter" in the
world.
In our arrogance observing another "fool in love", we missed the fact that love simplifies.
Ever talk to a
teenage girl who is hysterical? If you try to talk to her about what's actually upsetting her, she cannot see it or simplicity anywhere. Everything is convoluted, complex, connected, causal and confusing.
That of course is WHY she cannot fix it. Her ego gives her a maze that is impossible to navigate
and thereby absolves her of her responsibility to take action on her own behalf. Soo...she spins and hopes for rescue (note the victim mentality here). This pattern continues into adulthood.
The work of simplifying is the work of breaking the habit of expecting, seeking and preferring the
complex.
Your Ego Rewards the Complicated
You have to take on your ego to simplify your life. Now
you can see why you haven't done it yet.
On the flipside, you don't have to do anything for your life to be complex. And your ego rewards you for letting it have its way.
You're probably wondering how your ego rewards you? Your ego gives you positive feedback when you do what it wants to train you to do the OPPOSITE of what is good for you.
In the presence of something that is complex, you feel more relaxed. In the presence
of something that is challenging you feel a certain "attraction". (i.e., I can fix that troubled man!)
In the presence of a struggle, you subconsciously start thinking about how you are going to "TRIUMPH" (this was my old pattern).
I had an on-again off-again, roller coaster relationship with a guy who was only comfortable with women who were a train wreck. These women made him feel more confident, more desired, totally needed (I didn't NEED him enough), safer (as if THEY were going to leave!) and he had an escape route.
If he wanted to leave, he always had a reason and if it didn't work out he could say it didn't really matter.
His ego had conditioned him with negative associations when he got around a
healthy woman like me.
He was under constant stress and pressure whenever he was around me (self-judgment) and yet felt very relaxed around the crazy women.
His ego punished him with constant anxiety for
choosing me (the "you aren't good enough" variety) and rewarded him with less responsibility and less guilt when he stayed with choices that brought drama and chaos into his life.
As long as he picked the crazy women, he could misbehave all he liked. If he picked the healthier woman - by God there were
actually consequences for that shit!
If you look for this conditioning, you won’t like it, but you WILL find it.
It’s Never Too Late to Simplify
It's never too late to simplify. You will have to take on your ego to do it but the ROI on simplifying is always exponential.
And because I love you I'm going to make this simple - you can use my famous four steps for this too.
How To Simplify Your Life in 4 Steps
Step 1 Commitment: This step is the most critical. If you want relief, you have to commit to doing whatever it takes to simplify your
life.
So many people misunderstand commitment. They look for the favorable set of circumstances that will make the commitment "work". They do not understand by Universal Law those favorable circumstances are called into existence only AFTER the commitment has been made!
You commit while you don't know how. You commit while you're afraid. You commit while you're uncomfortable. You commit before you can afford it.
Commitments that change your life are never made easily or with a complete plan in hand.
You do not need to know “how” when you make the commitment. Making the commitment will bring the “how” to you. When the student is ready, the teacher appears.
I Commit to Simplifying My Life Starting Now.
Step 2 Clarity: To have clarity you must tell yourself the truth about what stands between
you and your commitment.
Telling the truth is hard because you don't realize how often you lie to yourself. To make this easy, take these four areas of your life and admit the truth:
My Health - Long, slow complex struggle or Simple?
My Wealth - Long, slow complex struggle or Simple?
My Love - Long, slow complex struggle or Simple?
My Work - Long, slow complex struggle or Simple?
Step 3 Choices: If you make a strong commitment and then tell the truth, your choices will always immediately drop to one of two things - you either change something to keep your commitment or you choose to stay the same.
Do I have to change something to bring simplicity to my health?
To your wealth?
To your
love life?
To your work?
Step 4 Action: This step is where
inspired action usually arrives. It is where the Divine assists you. Please note that everyone is looking to God to act FIRST and actually he acts FOURTH!
Here you identify one step, one action you can do that will enable you to begin keeping your commitment.
Take a deep breath and put your hand on your heart (this helps connect your intuition) and ask yourself what simple thing can I do to bring more simplicity to my health?
Ask the question for all four areas of your life. Trust what you get. Because you asked for a simple action, do not be surprised if you get a one-word answer, like "breathe." In my experience, hearts only speak in single words.
Commit to doing whatever you thought, felt, saw
or heard.
Do I need to say it? Keep it simple. Wash, rinse, repeat.
