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Hmm, well ONE solution goes to the core of it (my preference)
and ONE practice will lessen the impact of OSDS over time.
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The Solution:
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By whatever means you have at your disposal,
do the deepest inner work of your life to release the core belief that
YOU ARE NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
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Soften the core beliefs that YOU ARE NOT SAFE
and LOVE IS NOT SAFE.
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My personal variation on the latter was:
LOVE REQUIRES SACRIFICE, PAYMENT & STRUGGLE.
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You can see that as long as THAT was in my core,
I’d always trigger OSDS when relationships went well,
love was shown to me or even an opportunity for love arrived.
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I do this work with my private clients and there is no “prescribed path” to surfacing and rewriting these patterns.
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I can only tell you that growing out of your smaller, fear based self (that came about for good reasons!) IS the gold standard for ending OSDS.
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The Practice:
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This one you won’t be excited about because Alphas are “doers”. This won’t feel aggressive enough to many of you.
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Here goes: I have been having you do 'The Practice' already
by bringing your active attention to your OSDS.
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You will keep triggering your OSD pattern in the beginning. But if you are diligent in looking out for it, over time it will lessen and you’ll be able to “talk yourself out of your crazy”. Then you won’t predict, expect and PLAN for trouble soo reflexively (unconsciously) moving forward.
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Awareness is 80% of change ladies.
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Soo, get to work Alphas. :-)
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Even just shifting your awareness, so you are on the lookout for your own “protective measures” that shoot you in the foot is HUGE!
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Happy Shifting!