Slow Down to Speed Up: Sex & Spending🛥️👫🛍️
Published: Wed, 09/06/23
 Slow Down to Speed Up: Sex & Spending
This month we are going to learn how to slow downÂ
so that we can be present andÂ
really savor our life experience as a journey.Â
Alphas RUSH TOO
MUCH.
Let’s talk about some taboo things: Sex & Spending. Â
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A Pair of Pleasures We Do “Wrong”
Do you want to know why many people do sex and shopping wrong? They’re totally focused on arriving at a “destination.” Â
They are in a hurry to have an orgasmÂ
or buy those shoes with the red bottoms.
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When you
focus on the destinations, you ignore the journey.
Let’s assume that every destination takes 10 steps to reach it, no matter what it is. So buying that dream house, having multiple orgasms or just finding the perfect place mats for your dining room -> 10 steps. Â
Guess how many steps is the “getting” of the thing?
One.
The win is only one step.
Much like a game of monopoly, it’s one roll of the dice and you bankrupt everyone (or they give up) and then you win the game. The win is One Step!
That means for everything else that you’re pursuing, nine steps is the journey or the process.
It means that conservatively 90% of your time, your effort, or your LIFE is involved in “going there” rather than “arriving”. Â
I just talked my husband into a luxury cruise from Galveston, Texas to Playa Del CarmenÂ
Do you know what? The art of cruising is not being overly concerned about the stops of the cruise ship.Â
The true art of cruising is enjoying the entire
cruise… which is the JOURNEY TO the destination.
Physical intimacy done well is all about the journey.Â
As a woman, 70-90% of women do not achieve climax through vaginal penetration, so the “journey” is almost everything for us ladies!
If you have not trained yourself to appreciate, savor and SLOW DOWN to enjoy the journey in other areas of your life, you will not be able to do it sexually either. (Hint: You’ll also attract & tolerate partners who RUSH
YOU!)
Spending is the same.
People who can only get pleasure from the pinnacle moment when they purchase the “thing”, become
shopaholics.
Here’s an old exercise to help you learn to slow down with spending. Get a crisp $100 bill from the bank and put it in your purse and do not spend it.
Instead, everywhere you go, you can imagine spending your hundred dollars. Those cute shoes, yep I could buy them. Upgrade the
hotel room? Sure. Could I valet parking for the restaurant? Absolutely.
Your goal is to “spend” the same $100 in your purse 5, 10, 20 even 100 times.
What you will discover is you get a high, as if you were fully shopping, but you’re not completing the sale.
Boom! You’re getting pleasure from the journey! Over and over!
Slow Down to Speed up the feelings of pleasure and wealth.
Sexually, there is a time in a place for sex that is hurried or fast. But you should also have what people refer to
as “gourmet sex.”
If you go to a gourmet restaurant, you do not eat quickly. You sip, sample and savor. You don’t push yourself to finish every course.
If you have a partner, try that.
Fair warning: probably
you will have to tell your partner what you want to do ahead of time, because they’ll probably be used to your old, routine, rushed speed.
Slow Down Alphas as you consume your pleasure.Â
Rushing in a store or in your bed, is driven by lackÂ
and misplaced focus on the moment of the win. Â
In Joy,
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P.S.  We sat for several hours in an on board Art Auction. We did not rush. It was lovely to consider buying anything. And we ended up with a trio
of Thomas Kinkade paintings and another small landscape.
Slowly. Easily. Happily.
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 After her 2011 divorce,
Tanya set out to learn WHY soo many marriages fail. She used what she learned to save her 2nd marriage and found her calling to Save YOURS too.
She is a 25-year Divorce Lawyer, Founder of a High-Conflict Divorce Firm, Author of 'The Smart
Guide to Life After Divorce', Mensa Member, Advanced Clinically Certified in Hypnotherapy, Metaphysics PhD Candidate, Spiritual Teacher, Speaker & Life Coach.Â
Her coaching is recommended by the World-Famous Motivator, Les Brown, Best-Selling Love Coach Greg Baer and International Change Expert, Dr. Eldon
Taylor.Â
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Her greatest credential is finally separating Struggle from Success in Life & Marriage.
